Throwing Love #4 (Throwing Love #4) Page 3

  “And why is that?”

  “I think the best thing for you to do right now is to leave him be. I don't think it's necessary for you guys to be dating while he's trying to get on a team. It's very distracting.”

  “You have to be joking?”

  “No, I'm not, and I don't want you to tell Bennett I said so. Trust me on this – you need to back off.”

  I was pissed off at what my father had to say about the situation and I certainly didn't like being warned away from Bennett. I wanted to be with him, and I was being told to basically breakup with him. But there was no point in arguing with him, so I just told him I understood.

  I quickly got off the phone, regretting the fact that I had asked him about Bennett at all.

  I was steaming mad. I was thankful that I had managed to keep my cool while talking to my father, but it hadn't been easy. I wanted to choke him for the things he said. How could he put the business above my happiness? There was nothing wrong with Bennett having a relationship right now. We had been doing just fine before he showed up. Yes, Bennett definitely needed to get back to his practices, but we could have continued dating throughout that and we would have been just fine.

  I walked out of my bedroom, unable to stop pacing around the room. I went to make a pot of coffee. There was no point in trying to study, I was frustrated and wouldn't be able to concentrate. I sat down at the kitchen table and put my head in my hands.

  I couldn't believe what my father had said to me, but what was worse was that it appeared that Bennett was taking my father’s advice. It was the only explanation for the way he had been behaving lately. I couldn't believe that this was happening to me, and yet there it was right before my eyes. My father was grooming Bennett for his team, and he was removing all distractions to that end. It didn't seem to matter that I was the distraction and my happiness was at stake. No, of course not, my father always got what he wanted when it came to business.

  If only Bennett hadn't skipped his practices, then maybe he wouldn't have had to choose between his career and us. Why was I being punished for his stupidity?

  I got up and poured a cup of coffee to try to prevent myself from pacing all over the apartment again. I couldn't help but remember all those good dates we had when he was skipping practices. Things had been so good between us then. All Bennett had wanted at that time was to be with me, how could those feelings have just gone away?

  I almost wished that we were back to those days – anything to just keep our relationship going. I didn't want to be the one that took his dream away, but I also couldn't imagine not having him in my life. How could he make that choice? How could he want me gone?

  I had no idea what I was going to do. I didn't want to give Bennett an ultimatum because there was a chance that I would either lose him completely or he would lose his dream. In the end, I didn't want Bennett to grow to resent me because of my involvement in ruining his dreams.

  I sent a text to Connie. I needed her now more than ever.

  Chapter Seven

  When Connie walked through the door, I immediately burst into tears.

  “Oh my God. What is going on?” She came to the kitchen table quickly and wrapped her arms around me. It felt so good to be hugged, though I felt like an idiot for crying like a baby.

  “You didn't bring wine, did you? Because at this point I think I'm becoming an alcoholic with all my relationship issues.” I sniffed.

  She got up to pour us both more coffee, and she grabbed a box of Kleenex and handed it to me.

  “No, not this time. It's too early in the day for me. I thought you were studying for a test.”

  “I was before my father decided to ruin my life.”

  “Uh oh, this doesn't sound good. What happened?”

  “Ugh, I'm so sick of talking about it. You must be sick of listening, that's for sure.”

  “I am never sick of listening to your problems, that's what friends are for. I'm here for you, Emmi. What's wrong?”

  I wiped my nose with the Kleenex as she sat down at the table with our coffee. I tentatively took a sip and the warmth soothed me instantly.

  “I made a mistake.”

  “I doubt that. You are pretty level headed, Emmi.”

  “I called my Dad about Bennett.”

  “Okay, that was probably a mistake.”

  I laughed. “Yeah, tell me about it.”

  “No, you tell me about it. What happened with your dad?”

  “I called him and asked him how Bennett was doing. He was probably wondering why I didn't know.”

  Connie nodded. “Does he know that you guys are still together?”

  “I wasn't sure at first, but yes he definitely does. He just has no idea if it's serious or not.”

  I took another drink of my coffee while I formed what I wanted to say. Connie was also drinking her coffee, waiting patiently for me to continue.

  “So, I ask him and he tells me that things are going great and that he imagines that Bennett will be in the majors soon if he keeps up all his hard work.”

  “Oh man. I bet he loves all those extra practices.”

  “Oh, you bet he does.” I rolled my eyes, completely exasperated by my father. “So, I ask him for more info and by the sounds of it, he's going for Bennett. He wants him on his team, and I think it's only a matter of time before it happens.”

  “Wow, really? Well, that's what you both wanted, right? Even Bennett wanted to be on your dad’s team, so it sounds like it's a win for everyone.”

  “I think I'm going to lose him, Connie.”

  “Why? Why do you think that?”

  “My dad asked how things were going between Bennett and me, so I told him we were still seeing each other, but taking it slow. I was being really vague because I don't want him meddling even more than he already is. If he knew we were serious, I don't know how he would react.”

  “Yeah, I understand that. It was probably the best thing to do.”

  “So after he asks, he tells me that I need to leave Bennett alone.”

  “What? Really? He told you that?”

  “Yes, and I'm furious at him. He said that Bennett needs to focus and I need to let him do that. He said to leave him be, that it was a bad idea to get serious with Bennett right now.”

  “Oh girl, I'm sorry. That must have been hard to hear.”

  “It was brutal. I wanted to scream at him to mind his own business, but it's pointless to get emotional when it comes to my dad’s business because he doesn't believe emotions should be involved at all. I'm just so angry. I think he's feeding all of this BS to Bennett, and he is obviously taking my dad’s advice because I have barely talked to him all week. That's the most frustrating part...what is wrong with Bennett? Why is he doing this to me...to us?”

  “Oh, sweetie, I don't think Bennett is trying to hurt you. I think he's caught up in trying to build his dream. What your father said that day clearly had an effect on him because he's doing whatever your father wants now to make sure he gets in the major leagues. That's what you wanted for him, right?”

  “Yes, of course, but I want him, too. Is that just selfish?”

  “No, it's not. You obviously care a great deal about Bennett. You may even love him.” She smiled. “But going off on Bennett right now will not get you what you want. If you start freaking out and telling him to spend more time with you, then he is going to see you as a stumbling block that he doesn't need.”

  “Then what can I do?”

  “Exactly what your father said.”

  “No. I can't.”

  Connie nodded at me. “Yes you can. In fact, you probably don't have any choice at this point. You need to leave Bennett alone and let him come to you when he is ready. I really believe that he will come back to you. I think he will realize that he needs you just as much as you need him. Having a little patience right now will pay off later in a much bigger way, I assure you of that.”

  “I'm so scared of losing him, Connie.” Tears wer
e streaming down my cheeks. I took another drink of coffee as I wiped them away.

  “I know you are, but you will be okay. I promise.”

  “Okay, I guess I don't have any other choice.”

  Connie shook her head sadly. “No, you don't. The boys are calling the shots right now. You will either get Bennett back or you will realize you deserve so much better. Either way, you are going to be okay.”

  She came over and hugged me again. What she was saying made a lot of sense and whether I liked it or not, I would have to let Bennett decide if he really wanted to be with me anymore.

  I took a deep breath and calmed myself down. Everything was going to be all right. I just had to believe that.

  Chapter Eight

  What Connie had said hit home for me. Unfortunately, it didn't last very long. I had made the decision to back off from Bennett hoping that he would notice my absence and come back to me. But the next week passed with very little effort on Bennett's part. I didn't bother to bring up my concerns with him because I wanted to be supportive and didn't want to push him away even further. The problem was, the less I bugged Bennett for time, the more he seemed to spend on the field. It was like he embraced the fact that I called him less and decided to spend even more time practicing.

  It was becoming increasingly frustrating, as well as hurtful. How could he not see what he was doing? Or maybe he did and just didn't care anymore. It was becoming abundantly clear that Bennett chose to spend the majority of his time on the field and not with me. What could I do about it? Basically nothing.

  While I was trying to be understanding, what was really happening was that I was becoming more and more discontent with the relationship that I was in. There was something seriously wrong between Bennett and me. I was starting to think that I should just throw in the towel completely. My whole sense of happiness in my relationship was being disrupted by the fact that Bennett was being totally selfish with his time. I couldn't even believe he didn't notice my absence. Did he not miss me at all?

  Even talking to Connie had lost its effectiveness. There was only so much she could say to me before it all just sounded like excuses. She meant well for sure, but she had no idea how I felt. My world seemed to be falling apart. I wanted a relationship with Bennett, but what we had together was falling apart. There was nothing Connie could say that could change that fact.

  I made the decision to give Bennett a call and hope for the best. I crawled out of my warm bed and grabbed my phone off of the nightstand. I made the call and hoped he would answer the phone this time.

  As luck would have it, he answered right away.

  “Hey, Emmi, how are you?”

  “I'm good, Bennett. Long time no talk.”

  There was a pause. “Yes, I'm really sorry that we haven't been spending as much time as we used to. I just have a lot going on right now.”

  This would have been the perfect opportunity for me to unload on him and try to open his eyes about our relationship. But I decided to heed Connie's advice and leave it alone. I could hear in his voice that he felt bad and maybe that alone was a good sign.

  “I understand. Look I'm calling because I was hoping we could have lunch on Sunday? Would that be possible? I would really like to see you.”

  “Let me check my schedule.”

  Oh great.

  He paused as he looked at his calendar. “Yeah it looks like I'm free, so we are on for lunch, for sure.”

  I breathed a sigh of relief. “That's great.”

  “I'm looking forward to seeing you, Emmi.”

  I smiled, though I still felt so sad inside. “Me, too, Bennett.”

  We didn't talk further about his time away from the relationship. He knew something was wrong, that was at least some hope. I just needed to be happy that I had a date with him finally and keep my fingers crossed that it would keep blossoming from there.

  “I do have one request, though, Bennett, if that's okay.”

  “Sure, Emmi, what's up?”

  “I would like the opportunity to spend the whole day with you. I know you don't have a game or practice and it would mean a lot to me. We haven't done that in so long.”

  “I would like that, too.” There was excitement in his voice that made me smile. He sounded like he used to sound when we were together all the time. I felt that same old sense of excitement that our relationship used to have. The fire that had almost blown out seemed to be flickering in the air once again. I hoped that this would be an opportunity to rekindle our old flame because I wanted that more than anything. I did not want thing to die between us. It may be up to me to get us back on track, but I felt like I could be up to the challenge if it meant getting my man back.

  Chapter Nine

  Sunday arrived quicker than I could imagine and I was as giddy as a schoolgirl. I couldn't wait until I could be in Bennett's arms once again. He agreed to come a little earlier so that we could have brunch instead of lunch since he promised I could have the whole day with him.

  I dressed in something casual and pulled my long locks into a loose ponytail. I did my makeup and waited impatiently for him to come and pick me up.

  When he arrived, he came into my apartment and it had been so long since I had seen him that it felt like we were almost strangers once again. The thought made me sad, but I wasn't about to let it get me down.

  I fell into Bennett's arms and hugged him tight. He hugged me back just as tightly and buried his face into my neck. He smelled fantastic and it made me want to cancel brunch and take him to bed. It had been so long since we had been intimate that the urge was there for me immediately. I wanted Bennett in every way possible. I was so happy to see him and he seemed just as thrilled to see me, as well.

  We separated and he kissed me on the lips. I lingered on that kiss as long as possible. Our tongues touched and the spark between us ignited.

  He pulled away slowly with a smile on his face. “We better stop that or I'm not going to want to leave this apartment.”

  “So let’s not.”

  He laughed. “Let’s get going, beautiful.”

  I giggled and the smile never left his face. I was overjoyed that he seemed to be just as happy to be in my presence as I was to be in his.

  We went to brunch at out favorite spot where we ordered wine. We both had the lamb, as usual, and started to relax around each other.

  “I'm so happy to be here with you, Emmi. God, I missed you so much.”

  I beamed. “I'm so glad to hear you say that, Bennett. I have missed you so much, too. The distance has been hard on me.”

  “I know. And I know it might not seem like it, but it has been hard on me, too. Things have been really rough lately with all the practices and, of course, the games, especially now that we are in the height of the season. I just want you to know that I recognize that there has been an impact on our relationship because of that, and I'm really sorry about that.”

  I wasn't sure what to say. I was enjoying being with him, so I didn't want to get into some lengthy discussion that was going to ruin our day. I was happy to hear that he had noticed a decline in our relationship and felt bad about it. But what was more important to me was whether or not he was going to do anything about it. I stayed silent and waited.

  “I wish I had more time to be with you because I do miss it.”

  That was as far as he went with it. There was no mention of changing things or making things better. I could have gotten mad and gave him a piece of my mind, but I was happy to be spending the day with him and didn't want to ruin it.

  It was a positive step and I would accept that. There was no point in fighting when we were finally together again.

  “It's okay, Bennett. I do understand you have other obligations besides me. I'm just looking forward to spending an amazing day with you. That's what's important to me right now.”

  He smiled and seemed content with that. “I'm looking forward to it, too.”

  After brunch, we returned to my place. I
had rented a few movies for us to watch because all I wanted was some alone time with Bennett. I wanted to snuggle up to him and be as close as possible to him. Not to mention, if I could seduce him into some seriously hot sex that would be a bonus, as well.

  I got us some drinks and snacks while Bennett got the movie set up. We met up on the couch where we snuggled in together. His body was so warm and it made me realize just how much I had missed spending that sort of quality time with him. I hoped he was feeling the exact same way.

  We were having the best time together as we laughed throughout the whole movie. When it ended, I got up to switch it for the second one.

  “That was pretty funny,” Bennett said.

  “I know. Adam Sandler is hilarious.”

  When I returned to the couch, I leaned in and kissed Bennett. His mouth tasted so good that I slipped my tongue inside to find his. He met mine instantly and our kiss grew deeper. I moaned with the taste of him. There was instantly an ache between my legs. I had missed this so much with Bennett, and I was immediately turned on by his kisses.

  We quickly ditched the movie when he pulled me up from the couch and led me to my bedroom. I knew I wouldn't miss the movie for a second.

  Was it possible that my heart was beating even more furiously? I thought it was going to burst through my ribcage and come through my chest. Thump thump thump. Oh God, I might even pass out. I was so thrilled to be in my bedroom with him, with his mouth tasting mine over and over again.

  “Oh God, Bennett. I missed you so much.”

  He grabbed my ass while he kissed me. “I missed you, too, baby. Your ass feels so good, it's making me instantly hard.”

  I moaned at his words, loving every moment of it.

  I loved that Bennett was the kind of guy who wanted to please me in various ways and as much as possible. I grew warm all over with the thought. I was becoming incredibly turned on as his tongue continued to play with my own. Our kisses were becoming increasingly passionate and it made me ache for him that much more.